Is this worded correctly?

Question

Is the following sentence worded correctly? I want to make sure "my and others' goals" specifically is the correct way to say that, or if there's a less awkward way of phrasing.

I have sought various mentoring roles both in and out of school to advance my and others’ goals.

Answer 1

I would leave out "my" because a mentor should be focused on the goals of those they mentor, rather than themselves.

Rewrite:

I have sought various mentoring roles, both in and out of school, to help those I mentor to reach their goals.

Please note: I separated the non-essential information "both in and out of school" with commas.