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English problem

Amanda is a human being with dual characteristics of feminine and masculine traits thus she is in conflict between being a stereotypical female character and an independent female character.
 
Should I omit the comma here and what would be a way to condense it? 

Comments

 I think it can be made both more concise and clearer in this fashion:  
 
Amanda's feminine, stereotypically dependent traits conflict with her more masculine, stereotypically independent side.  

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Lawrence D. | Student for Life with knowledge in ESL, English, and HistoryStudent for Life with knowledge in ESL, ...
1
Naina is close, though a little incorrect. "Amanda, a human being with both feminine and masculine traits, she wonders if she is a stereotypical female or an independent one."

Though, I think it doesn't capture the original meaning effectively. Perhaps, "Amanda, a human being with both feminine and masculine traits, is conflicted with the choice of being a stereotypical female or independent female character.
 
You may wish to omit the "human being", that is probably assumed to be the case. Also, "character" adds little to no value to the sentence. If you followed this advice, it could be written as, "Amanda, who has both feminine and masculine traits, is conflicted with the choice of being a stereotypical or independent female."

Best wishes.
 
Naina B. | Naina, a versatile tutorNaina, a versatile tutor
4.8 4.8 (155 lesson ratings) (155)
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Here is one way:
 
Amanda,  a human being has both feminine and masculine traits;   she  wonders if she is a  stereotypical female or an independent one.
 
You can try other similar ways and see which one you like.
 
Hope it helps.

Comments

Lawrence,
 
Thank you, I did not go into analysis of construction as well as meaning. I just gave her a quick example to try additional sentences on her own.