
Emma P. answered 02/16/21
Prior English Student
Hi, Edwin! Great job so far on forming a concise, creative title for your petition.
Some adaptations I would consider including begin with instead of using "Stop HCPSS from using..." to begin, let's reform that to something more succinct and formal: "The Need to Alleviate HCPSS' Involvement in...". Evidently, we have reformed this portion of the title by adding in a noun (need) closely ollowed by a verb (alleviate) while simultaneously including the subject (HCPSS).
Now, let's incorporate "Lightspeed/Relay and invasion of privacy programs" into this same formal fashion. We can form this to fit our agenda by switching the order of the phrases around, "The Use of LightSpeed Relay and Role in Privacy Program Invasions". Here, we have once again added a noun and some simple switching around in the order.
Let's compile your final sentence into one:
"The Need to Alleviate HCPSS' Involvement in the Use of LightSpeed Relay and Role in Privacy Program Invasions".
I hope this helped you in creating a more compelling title for your presentation! Excellent job thus far and if you have any additional questions, feel free to reach out.