Our brains are primed for storytelling and specific details. Focus on cultivating these in your writing.
Think of the differences between these two sentences: "I am excellent at remaining calm under pressure," and: "When my grandmother was having a stroke, I focused on driving at the precise speed required to arrive at the hospital as fast as possible––without getting in an accident or getting a ticket, of course." What sentence intrigues you more? Both convey the same general idea. However, the first sentence relies on abstraction and generality. Our brains start to drift when we read it. Moreover, it functions as a claim instead of proof.
The second sentence? It features a vivid incident (grandmother having a stroke) and a gripping story (trying to get to the hospital as fast as possible). It makes the reader sit up in their seat. We automatically wonder: was the writer's grandmother okay in the end? And moreover, even more importantly: contains proof that the person writing the sentence remains precise, methodical, and practical in a pressured situation. We get a sense of how they think; this writer clearly attends to all of the variables required as they pursue their high-stakes goal. This is precisely the sort of person who would make a good doctor or surgeon. Isn't it wild how we begin to glean these important facts from one vivid, detail and storytelling-oriented sentence?
This is precisely the kind of writing that will help your personal essay or statement stand out.
Anita W.
09/03/25