You ask a good question. There are no easy rules for removing excess words. One test is to read a sentence and check to see if you can preserve meaning after removing a word or words. As an example, we can take your first sentence and strike several words while keeping your intended meaning "
Like a lot of people, I actually have the habit of actually adding a lot of actual padding words when I actually write." Unnecessary words are often adverbs, such as actually. When in doubt about the part of speech, copy and paste it into an online dictionary.
You might try checking your writing with the Hemmingway Editor at http://hemingwayapp.com/. It won't catch everything, however.
Writing will go more smoothly over time if you can avoid introducing extra words into your compositions. It is tough to do, and even experienced writers work hard to remove filler words. Start by using an outline for your formal writing, which will help you stick to your main idea and supporting details. Then keep your sentence construction simple in your initial draft. As you revise, add in more transitions where needed. Finally, practice makes perfect. Keep writing and reading often. It will help you develop your inner editor.