Nicholas C. answered • 10/01/19
(Master's Student) Study/ Performance Skills, Psychology, Writing
Hey, Rammile! Thanks for posting.
Let’s start with the first part of the first sentence. “I believe...” By definition opinions are not objective. Opinions are subjective. Does this mean opinions don’t have a place in academic writing? Depends who you ask. My opinion is yes, they do have a place (subjective and subject to internal and/or human things). You might consider writing, “The incidence of drug overdoses is prevalent today.” This rendition trims the fat, getting rid of some of the clutter that we all put down to the page.
Next sentence. “What people will difficult problem…” Is a little incoherent to me. I’m unsure what you’re trying to say. With, “I think that they can no longer bear the problem and that is why they get into drugs,” I have a better idea as to the meaning of the second sentence. “I think,” is subjective, and a lot of the time we write it, because it’s something we often say in our speech. It’s great for character dialogue. For objective accounts, not so much. “They can no longer,” is a situation where we may want to adjust word choice. “They,” sometimes comes off as accusative and as a means of deliberately distancing ourselves from a person or group. Consider: “Many of them can no longer bear the problem and that is why they get into drugs.”
Sentence three: “That’s why if you are a psychologist, you should treat your patients in a way that helps them understand their problems and a way to deal with them.” I advise against the use of “should” in anything in the field of psychology. We don’t have to do anything anyone tells us. Instead, opt for, “You may consider,” or any of its varients. Let’s adjust the sentence: “That’s why psychologists may wish to consider treating their patients in a way that helps them understand their problems, and ways to deal with them.” The pronoun, “You” is something that we may want to avoid. I’d ask your professor, the agency you’re writing for, or consult articles published in the journal you wish to publish work in for the final say with these pronouns (I, you, we).
Last sentence! Almost there! “Yeah I know it can be very difficult but but hey, that’s what you specialized, and in, why?” I’m going to make adjustments based on my earlier comments. “It can be difficult, but psychologists specialized in this for a reason.” I cut every instance of “very” in all my manuscripts, regardless of the genre/ area of writing.
To put them together: The incidence of drug overdoses is prevalent today. Many of them can no longer bear the problem and that is why they get into drugs. That’s why psychologists may wish to consider treating their patients in a way that helps them understand their problems, and ways to deal with them. It can be difficult, but psychologists specialized in this for a reason.
Don’t use this, this is my personal flair (we all have our own): The incidence of drug overdose is prevalent today. Many people with substance use disorders find it difficult to live with something, be it relationship stress, trauma, work or other life stress. There are any number of reasons that people find themselves in positions where they use substances. That’s why psychologists may wish to consider treating their patients in a way that helps them understand their problems. That helps them develop ways to live with the experiences that drive them towards substance abuse— and in some cases, result in overdoses. It is not easy, but psychologists make the choice to work with their clients. They have considerable sway in the therapeutic relationship, and while treatment outcomes are attributable to many things, the way in which helping professionals approach their clients is going to remain pivotal to a client’s success.
Let me know if you have any questions. I’m curious as to where the little blurb you gave us is headed. Once again, thanks for being brave and submitting your question. It can be hard to press that button (Not sarcastic).
