Check my grammar please

Question

Sarah was spent a lot of time, accompanied by Daniel. In one day her parents asked her to meet Daniel, Sarah was happy because she thought that her parents would allow her to spend time with Daniel. But her parents they decided to send her to Iraq later. Sarah sent to Virginia to spend time with her friend, her name was Loome. In one day her father calls her to tell her that Daniel was arrested.Sarah was confused about Daniel. Sarah was preparing to leave for Iraq, and she was worried but Loome told her to not worry.

Answer 1

Sarah would spend a lot of time, often with Daniel. One day, her parents asked her to meet with Daniel. Sarah was happy because she thought her parents would allow her to spend time with Daniel as usual, but her parents decided to send her to Iraq later. Before the trip to Iraq, she went to Virginia to spend time with her friend, called Loome. Whilst on vacation in Virginia, her father called her and  told her that Daniel, her bosom friend had been arrested.Sarah was so confused about the news concerning Daniel. At the time, Sarah was almost preparing to leave for Iraq. She became very worried but Loome told her not to.

 

COMMENTS:

NB: This student has a good theme to her story, but the chronological arrangement of her ideas is obviously an identified challenge for her. This student also needs help on her verb tense forms to be able to identify the tenses to use in her writings, when and how to use them effectively to communicate meaningfully to her audience (readers). There is room for improvement.