
Pat M. answered 08/26/20
Skilled with experience in comparative and world religions
If you are trusting in your own goodness or fear of punishment to save you, then you are already as close to heaven as you will ever get while you are alive here on earth.
The issue appears to be that you do not want to attend worship services at a local church. I believe your heart would change on that question once you understand a few simple truths:
God created all things. Human beings rejected God by sinning against Him. Every human being now has a sin nature because of what those first human passed on to us. Sin separates us from God and it will do that forever unless someone pays for it. Jesus paid for your sin and mine through His life, death and resurrection. If you believe and trust that His finished work is enough to save you, you will avoid hell altogether. The Bible is clear on this subject. Once you trust in Him, you may find that you would like to worship with others who share your beliefs.