How does Millais use language to suggest that his work makes him feel stressed?

Question

Instead of going to a musical party with my brother and father, I will write you

something of my doings. I have a headache, and feel as tired as if I had walked twenty

miles, from the anxiety I have undergone this last fortnight

All the morning I have been drawing a dog, which in unquietness is only to be surpassed

by a child. Both of these animals I am trying to paint daily, and certainly nothing can

exceed the trial of patience they occasion. The child screams upon entering the room,

and when forcibly held in its mother’s arms struggles with successful obstinacy that I

cannot begin my work until exhaustion comes on, which generally appears when

daylight disappears. A minute’s quiet is out of the question. The only opportunity I have

had was one evening, when it fell asleep just in the position I desired. Imagine looking

forward to the day when next one of these provoking models shall come! This is my only

thought at night and upon waking in the morning.

When I suggest corporal punishment in times of extreme passion, the mother, after

reminding me that I am not a father, breaks out into such reproofs as these: “Poor dear!

Was he bothered to sit to the gentleman? Precious darling! Is he to be tormented? No,

my own one; no, my popsy, my flower, cherub” etc., etc., dying away into kisses, when he

(the baby) is placed upon his legs to run about my room and displace everything.

Immediately he leaves off crying, remarking that he sees a “gee-gee” (pointing to a stag’s

head and antlers I have hung up), and would like to have one of my brushes.

This infant I could almost murder; but the dog I feel for, because he is not expected to

understand. A strong man comes with it and bends him to my will, and all the while it

looks as calm as a suffering martyr. I do more from this creature in a day than from the

other in a week.

This year I hope you will come and see the produce of all this labour before the pictures

go to the exhibition.

Answer 1